Your favorite bartender is back from prision
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
