I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
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