My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you donโt have to recycle anymore ๐๐
Randomize
