Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Randomize