Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize