normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
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