alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
Randomize
