Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
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