New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize
