guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
Randomize
