I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
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