would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
