C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
Randomize
