You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
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