Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
Say something about gay babies.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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