he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Randomize
