Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
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