a guy named alex was hitting on my friend tonight. he doesnt work on wind turbines tho.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
25 Facts Men Don’t Know About Women Until They Live Together
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.