Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
