No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize
