Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize