Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
Randomize
