Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
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