Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Why are there so many empty soda cans in my room?
You put them in a circle around your bed and said it was the best way to ward of the witches from hocus pocus....then you remembered you needed salt too. I'm assuming you havent gone to the bathroom yet.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Randomize
