If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
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