it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
Randomize
