i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
Randomize
