It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
