She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
Randomize
