I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Randomize
