Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
Randomize
