What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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