Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
I'm like, not good at living.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Randomize
