is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
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