i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
