Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
25 Facts Men Don’t Know About Women Until They Live Together
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
I feel like death gave me a hand job
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.