You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Randomize
