these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
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