I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
Randomize
