It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
