I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
Randomize
