youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
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