my phone is set on vibrate and its tucked up in my left front pocket. call me back 20 times real quick.
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
Randomize
