you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
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Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
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