all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
Randomize
