so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
you're a fucking everclear ninja. the whole goddamn formal blacked out. you're the worst dj ever
but I'm the best friend ever. I got you laid
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
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