So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
Don't make out with my wife yet
woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
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