please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
Randomize