Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
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the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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