And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
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