Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Randomize
